fuck this shit..
i keep tormenting myself with the question of why..
why did this happen why did that happen
i blame myself most of the time..
its for some really stupid shit too..
i hate my life most of the time..
i dunno folks.. i mean.. i guess im just going through a fucked up time..
i mean shit.. i miss my ex.. i miss having fun.. im having problems at home.. school.. credit card problems..
everything is just crashing and caving in ..
i find myself asking why why why .. then i wonder .. well if i would have done this .. if i owuld have done that.. then maybe i woudnt be here today..
and yet the one thing that made it alll go away is not here anymore.. i miss you soo much ana.. i pray to god you have a wonderful life.. i pray this other person your with .. well i hope he loves you as much as i will love you .. for the rest of time..
i say fuck it now to the bullshit that comes into my mind.. tmie to see results .. i miss too many things i think ..

FUCK THIS LIFE SHIT>. god i hate some of the shit you throw my way.. i hate that you took someone very special away from me..
when will you quit playing these stupid games
i am now here to prove everyone wrong.. prove that there is still hope in this world..
hopefully i will find love again..
but fuck some of that shit for now..
i have seen but a glimpse of misery into what you call life..
you will always torment me with the question of why .. it is the one that plagues my mind at times ..
i miss her more than anything in the world.. why i ask..
i would take my life. but i feel i have a lot yet to prove.. so many other people to help...so many stories to share..
fuck some of this you throw my way..
i hate alot of parts of my life.. but yet i sit back and wonder .. would if i did do some things.. would i still be here today.. would i have met and done some of the things i did in the past..
again the question of why arises..
so fuck you i say .. fuck this shit.. fuck everything that goes around me. fuck the hate..
sorry gus if yall didnt understand what i am saying.. .. i have just had a lil bad news from the beginnning of this year.
turns out i still miss my ex.. plus i have a lil credit card problem.. and family problems.. school problems.. spiritual problems..
and the one thing i used to have that would seem all these things seem insignificant . is now gone.
i hope you have a wonderful life ana.. i pray to god this other person loves you the way i will always love you..
WHY?